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She's Gone

My friend made her transition this morning. How do I say goodbye? How do we continue life without her? The world lost a vibrant, tender soul. I’ve lost a best friend. Someone described her as a living angel; there is no better description of her.

Cindy didn’t have a mean bone in her body, she was so kind and generous. She was stunningly beautiful yet never felt she was. She had the most beautiful smile and not because she was married to a dentist, her smile showed genuine happiness. Her smile lit up a room. She could be somewhat introverted yet entertained everyone and made them feel welcomed.

She loved her husband and sons, deeply. Family and friends were everything to her.

Together, with John, she created a loving home. Making all of us feel as if we were family. The Kaz house was the second home for all their son'

s friends. Each of them felt her love; they called her Mama Kaz because she treated like they were hers. Last week, when she had her surgery, all of them reaching out to see the family and show their love and concern.

She sent a text to Nick and I last night. It was a video of the last Kaz party at the Cabana. Both Nick and I responded how we had such great memories of those parties. Cindy gave us something to treasure. I’d like to think she was reminiscing about those times last night, lovingly looking back on the wonderful life she created for us all.

Why does someone who is so vibrant and loving have to leave us so soon? We were all thanking God for hearing our prayers when she made it through the difficult surgery and now, she’s gone. Why God? Why have us so happy and grateful just to have her leave us? I’m grappling with this.

I was talking to a friend just now who said maybe it was the “gift in between”. Gift in between? She responded maybe God was going to take her during the surgery but gave you these two weeks so we could let her know how grateful we were for her. Maybe God wanted Cindy to know what an incredible gift she was to everyone and how much she was loved and valued. He gave us the time to tell her of our love to help us carry forward.

I am so thankful for the gift in between; I was able to text her last week to let her know how much I loved her and how grateful I was she was still with us. How I realized how empty my life would be without her in it. She responded she loved me. I’ve saved that text to keep forever.

I’m heartbroken you’re gone, sweet Cindy. My life is a little bit empty now. Thank you for being my friend, for loving me, for always being my cheerleader, for just being incredible you. “To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die.” – Thomas Campbell

I love you Cindy.


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